Dolphins Are Dangerous Animals That Could Rape You And Kill Your Baby

Wikipedia

A couple from North Carolina traveled to Hawaii last month to pursue their dream of having a "dolphin-assisted birth" for their baby due in July, the Charlotte Observer reports.

The couple is hoping to bond with animals in the wild, spending time in the water with them before and after the birth. If the new parents are "lucky" they may even even be able to have the baby in the water, The Sirius Institute, the organization helping with the odd birth plan, says on their website.

"It is about reconnecting as humans with the dolphins so we can coexist in this world together and learn from one another," the mom-to-be told the Observer. It brings "peace, comfort and strength to the mother and baby during labor," she added.

This is a very bad idea.

Although dolphins can be incredibly intelligent and are often affectionate toward and form bonds with humans (they have been know to give gifts to people in Australia, team up with Brazilian fishermen, and blow fun bubble rings, for example), the animals can be incredibly dangerous, too.